Webcam Shots and Sketches/Doodles… the basic
“capturing what I do when I’m bored and my web cam is on.

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I think primarily having my life take place in the work and home environment it doesn’t give me a lot of opportunity for insight. My brain has turned into its own DVR and I can’t tell if I’m truly content or I’m mentally broken. Phase one of being a Stepford wife without the husband.

Even my dreams are television tainted. This past weekend I dreamt that I was a contestant on Bret Michael’s Rock of Love 2. On the plus side, they had to take me and place me in a separate environment until the final two shows took place because he was so into me that I forgot about all the other girls. The downside is- EW. I liked Bret Michaels for a split second when I was 15 and felt immediately he was a mindless one note rocker who not only wanted to get into a women’s panties, but wanted to wear their panties as well. Seriously, dude still looks like a lady.

The dream disturbed me.

I’ve also caught a peek at American Idol for the first time since it’s been on -ever. The judges bored me, the contestants were so staged. As a child I could have come up with a better idea and execution for a show. The only reason I didn’t was because… well I was a child and I wasn’t allowed to call Hollywood.

What prompted this? An episode of the Simpson’s last night. I used to be idealistic! I used to be passionate over various issues! I used to have a zillion thoughts on a zillion topics!!! These days it’s, “I truly don’t care as long as it doesn’t increase taxes or inconvenience me in any way.

Am I a victim of television?

I guess it’s premature to call myself a television addict as I’m not addicted to any shows, I don’t watch talk shows, I don’t watch reality shows unless I’m completely bored- and even then I see it for what it is, cheap, staged entertainment for the brainless, I don’t watch soap operas… Over all, television is a back ground noise for when I’m on the computer. And when I’m not on the computer, I’m watching movies, and when I’m not watching movies I’m playing video games! WHEW! I’m not addicted to TV! I’m addicted to everything else that needs a monitor!

Thank God. I feel so much better now.

I think for the most part, having the steady stream of writing my thoughts on this platform, posting science/tech news that interests me causes me to have a constant release. It’s not that I don’t retain everything, I guess I’m not holding on to a zillion a thoughts in which they begin to boil desperately wanting to explode into conversations.

In addition to that, I also have a conversation flow going through the day.

Maybe I’m not broken, maybe I just finally have outlets that allow it to be quiet inside my head.

Another day in which my area grasps for any kind of weather news. Take today for instance. I woke up early and checked the school website “Closed”. I was confused at this announcement as I merely saw a dusting outside. It almost looked like frost as the pavement was clear, yet there were traces of snow or frost on cars. Certainly nothing that could shut down an entire school district which caused me to stay home from work today. It had to be worse elsewhere. It just had to.

Pictured is what I took as soon as the sun finally rose above the horizon around 7:15 am (PST), literally shedding light on the situation.

I turned on the news and a female reporter moved her foot across half an inch of snow “As you can see, if I move the snow around, it could almost act like ice, which could be very dangerous in traffic†And behind her the road itself had nothing on it and people were driving as normal. She looked at the vehicles who moving along like “business as usual” and commented, “Thankfully I’m in an area where people are driving with more caution than normal.”

As the day progressed, what little frost was on the ground soon melted away as the sun broke through the clouds (OH NO!!! FIERY ORB!). It seemed like a typical non-eventful January day, yet the captions still read on the new sites “January Storm 08″

“Snow and ice make travelling a challenge in the valley.

Numerous snow-related car crashes are occurring in the Salem-Keizer area, police dispatchers said.

Nearly every on-duty Oregon State Police trooper is at the scene of an accident at this time, state police dispatchers said.

An Oregon Department of Transportation dispatcher said that conditions are “blown open†with crashes in many locations.

The dispatchers said there have not been any serious injury crashes, but several rollovers.

Morning commuters should slow down and drive safely, or delay their trip to work until later.” <-Just so you know, that was in a remote location, they changed it from the one they had earlier which was quite laughable and I guess didn’t capture the treacherous weather hazards they were trying to convey. I’m curious how long it took to shuffle through photos before they found this one.

As I sat in disbelief of the entire situation and trying to find logic in the closures, I decided to put a spin on the situation. This is what *really* happened in Salem Oregon this morning:

Zombies, Zombies, EVERYWHERE

“Schools are closed today due to an uprising of the undead. Local authorities are unclear how this army came to be as no mysterious forces have been detected as of late. Many families are being turned as we speak, so we ask each of you to barricade yourself indoors if you were not able to make it out of town in time. This new genetically mutated batch of the undead are quite faster than your a-typical zombies and also know how to drive automatic transmission vehicles. It is also rumored that a few are able to take the transit system.

To make matters worse, should you try to escape the infected areas, weather reports indicate partly sunny skies later in the day.”

I have a pair of pink massage slippers that I’ve never actually worn or tried out. During the many frantic “GAH! I can’t find anything to wear!” tossing of shoes and clothing that happens while you’re trying to find an outfit to go with your mood caused one slipper to land under my bed and the sibling to dwell in the back of the closet.

The other day I noticed one of the slippers sitting outside of my bedroom door. Although I found it a little odd, I figured it was just Stan Lee doing his cat thing. Perhaps the texture intrigued him. Maybe he wanted to see how he looked. Who knows. I placed the slipper back in the closet and then saw him trot right back out with it. He wasn’t gnawing on it, scratching or even playing with it. He merely placed it outside of the door.

I was on my way to the store so I figured I’d leave the slipper there and take care of it later. When I came home, I noticed the other slipper was sitting right next to it.

 I have a couple of new theories:

Stan thinks I look stressed, so he’s wanting me to *use* the slippers so that I can relax and unwind. <-This theory has me feeling all warm and fuzzy as the cat truly cares about me. Awww.

Stan has taken over my room completely and has decided that the slippers are hideous and must go.  <- This theory has me a little nervous because it means he’s taken over my room and thinks that I have horrible taste which means he’s judging me.

Current Mood: awake

More things were put in perspective today as I was watching television and a piece on Heath Ledger came on. It still had an impact on me, obviously, and as tears were forming in my eyes and then spilling on my cheek (yes, I’m weepy today), Jonathon looked at me and smiled, “Mom, it’s okay… you have me, I’m still alive. That’s what’s important.” I smiled and hugged him and kissed because he was right.

Then he watched Mortal Kombat and has been trying to challenge me to a death match ever since. Each time I walk around his parameter, his small hand whips out and chops me, followed by a “HIYAH!”

(sigh)

Current Mood: Amused

The ground is dry. The grass is green. I’ve accepted that the only place I’ll get snow is in my dream. Gah that sucks.

After restoring an old pc that took up most of my mental capacity, I found it to be *meh* and didn’t realize the storage was so small- so I put it back in the closet. Now I’m back to sitting in my living room, writing on my laptop and realizing it’s not as bad as I thought.

A few other comparisons put my thoughts into perspective today:

Cleaning out the litter boxes for the two Velociraptor’s who reside in my apartment caused me to think of all the people who have to clean out horse stables- or even worse, people who have to clean up after elephants.

This one is a little personal: Annoyed with wearing a thong to avoid panty lines- I was wondering, “How come men don’t have panty lines (or brief/boxer lines)?” I posed this question to a friend. At first he said that perhaps men’s pants were thicker or worn more loosely (which is what I started to ponder initially) and he informed me that a certain male co-worker had them and the visual made me feel very ill. I guess men do have the lines after all, they just don’t care… and the material on their pants is a bit more loose and thick. No fair, but the visual caused me to be okay with the torture garment that is the thong.

I was also realizing how pleasant the morning drivers were lately and it caused me to smile, perhaps it was merely due to being in a good mood last week because today after I had that *realization*, all of a sudden every moron came darting out in all directions, acting like morons and reminding me that I was still in Salem.

A conversation this morning had me thinking even further. I can’t recall what prompted it… AH! Cats. They had been driving me crazy the past few nights as I had been fighting insomnia. I was wondering if I should get a cage for the youngest one to be used at night. My friend reminded me, “Sure if you don’t mind hearing (he made a ton of annoying meowing sounds)” I let him know that his point was made; and then he suggested that I could always let him out at night.

First of all: Yeah right. Secondly, I reminded him of all the busy roads I live by, including the freeway! That took the conversation to road kill and the how even in the busiest areas, a raccoon could get hit and no one scrapes it off the road. It will just continue to get run over until it’s pulp, and then the rain washes it away. I’ve always wanted to take a picture of that and do a time lapse photo of the carcass (as morbid as that may sound). Then I asked, due to the recent event of people walking across the highway and getting killed, “Do you think in time people will be known in Salem as road kill? People will become so used to it that soon they’ll be treated like the raccoons, ignored until they become pulp and then just washed away by the rain?”

I also had my third week of the year traditional question (at least in the past 3 January’s) “When will I have my first kiss of the year and with whom?” Then I remembered the first guy I let kiss me in 2007 which was half way through the year… and it caused me to be quite okay with going a full year without.

Okay, so back to the insomnia. I didn’t want to be dependent on wine in order to assist in helping me sleep. I hate that, so I stopped drinking it. Oy, it was right back to the sleepless nights. One of my friends suggested benadryl, so I tried it and omg ‘restless legs’. I tried it two nights in a row and it was the same issue. My body and mind were fully awake, only my eye lids (not my eyes), wanted to close down. It was weird, awful and my insomnia sent my cats schedule all out of whack- which their schedule was already a little weird as I’ve only had them one and two months.

Tonight I bought a sleep aid. I have a feeling it’ll be back to restless legs again and a night of hell. And no- I don’t want suggestions of working out before I go to bed as it only energizes me. Tea does nothing. Warm milk will keep me up all night being as I’m lactose intolerant and I’m not drinking spirits.

There you have it- those were my January 24th thoughts.

Current Mood: bored

I was a little shocked this morning when I came into work and began my routine. I sat down with my water, coffee, logged onto my computer and then turned on my work messenger. The first ping of the day was an inquiry about a friend. “Did you hear about Jesse?”

My heart practically stopped. Jesse?? What happened to Jesse?? I just talked with him at work yesterday. Did the task I asked him to do wind up giving him a heart attack, cause him to be distracted whilst driving home and into a ten car pile up? WHAT HAPPENED TO JESSE?! Immediately I searched my messenger list. He was online and obviously not dead or on life support in some hospital that was in another state as the injury was SO bad that they had to life flight him to a special place (my mind tends to run away with me).

I calmly replied back, “No. What happened to Jesse?”

“He lost his apartment to a fire yesterday.”

From that I gathered all the information from Jesse who was sitting at his desk and not doing what I would be doing, which would be on my knees in front the ruins of my home, with my fist shaking at the heavens, screaming, “WHY?!?!” (okay, perhaps I have a level head in crisis, but I’ve always liked that visual, especially during Oscar season.)

Continue reading A Rocky Start of a New Year

Aquadome recovers, a cat is torment for pictures’ sake and then taunted by its rival, a fish swims, and a film is viewed.