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Yikes… I’ve been tagged !!!
July 4, 2008 | 29 Comments
This appeared last year on the blog Dining Hall. That site has since closed down. Fortunately, Sia had saved a copy on her system. Thank you, dear Sia, for recognising a magnum opus when you see one.
Each morning, I see the Technorati links on my dashboard. I open each one, fervently hoping it’s not a ‘tag’.
If I am tagged, I get a sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach. It’s an irrational fear that I’ve been grappling with. Part of it has to do with the word ‘tag’ and its myriad connotations.
Tag: verb
1. To set off by or as if by a mark indicating ownership or manufacture: brand, identify, label, mark, trademark.
2. To attach a ticket to: label, mark, ticket.
3. To describe with a word or term: call, characterize, designate, label, name, style, term.
4. To follow closely or persistently: dog, heel, trail.
I particularly don’t like being tagged for Memes, where I’m expected to bleat about myself.
Off topic, but do goats really ‘bleat’? Or is that what sheep do? What is the word for goatspeak?
For those not familar with these terms in the blogging context, a tag is the type of thing where you say seven things about yourself, and tag seven others, and they do the same and tag seven more people, and so on.
Links and love are passed around – a bit like those chain e-mails. It’s a form of social networking that can be fun and creative in small doses.
A meme (pronounced like “theme”)
As defined by Richard Dawkins in The Selfish Gene (1976): “a unit of cultural transmission, or a unit of imitation.” “Examples of memes are tunes, ideas, catch-phrases, clothes fashions, ways of making pots or of building arches. Just as genes propagate themselves in the gene pool by leaping from body to body via sperms or eggs, so memes propagate themselves in the meme pool by leaping from brain to brain via a process which, in the broad sense, can be called imitation.” In this sense, chain letter components are memes.
The meme can be “What are you reading?” or “Five favourite foods” or anything that the person who sends it has thought up.
Don’t get me wrong. When someone tags me, they’re telling me
“I read your blog, and not all of it is crap. I sorta enjoy it. I commend your efforts and want to get to know you better.”
Nice sentiment, and I appreciate that. However, the ‘tagging‘ bit bothers me. I’ve been trying to place my finger on what exactly bothers me about being ‘tagged’.
I
See that smirk J’s trying to hide? That’s what bothers me the most. He rarely gets tagged. Or acknowledged. Even if he writes a post and signs it, or puts up a pic, most of the comments and feedback are addressed to me.
While he does not always get credit for what he does, the upside is that he escapes being tagged. And then he gets to walk around with a smirk, because I am expected to respond to the tag and he knows how much I dread that.
II
Anyone who reads our blog knows that I love to bleat about myself. However, I love to do it of my own accord where I don’t have to follow parameters confining what I have to say.
Plus, there are privacy concerns. Memes with themes pertaining to location, travel or occupation may reveal more about me than I want to reveal.
Most of us feel special to be asked to talk about ourselves. Remember those high school days when many of us had journals talking about how special and unique we were? More recently, this form of self-expression takes place through social networking sites like myspace.
Some folks find themselves more diffident and less articulate than others, when it comes to revealing details about themselves.
III
I am fascinated by the idea that someone would want to know where someone else has lived. Or traveled. Or what they eat. Or what they wear. Or where they shop. Or how many times they shower in a week (if at all). Or what they read.
If I want to know these things about another person, I’ll probably send them an e-mail.
I guess some folks enjoy knowing these things about others and disclosing the same about themselves on a public forum. Nothing wrong with that. I enjoy reading about others when they post their Memes, but I don’t wish to reciprocate, ‘cos I really have had a boring life.
What are the response strategies to being tagged?
For ease of explanation, let’s divide the blogging world into two categories – the socialites and the party poopers. There’s nothing right or wrong about people of either dispositon. That’s just the way each individual is.
As a party pooper, i can
a) ignore a tag.
b) or I can feel obliged to acknowledge it in some way – by responding to the meme and passing it on.
However, I don’t really want to.
That, in turn, makes me feel guilty. The next time I visit that person’s blog, I think of the tag I didn’t respond to.
Yes, this is entirely my problem, generated in my head. The person who tags me is most often someone I know and have previously interacted with. She/he most certainly does not intend to make me feel obligated or guilty.
The fact is, I do. So I respond, and inflict this on a host of others. The socialites will be delighted. The party poopers (there are many in the closet) will find themselves in the same bind that I was.
There’s a third way.
c) Send an e-mail to the person who tagged you, saying,
“Thanks for thinking of me. Unfortunately I will not be participating or passing it on. I have an irrational fear of tags which I will discuss with my shrink at the next appointment. Meanwhile, please accept my regrets.
If you really want me to pass things on and link back to you, you may bestow upon me this if you wish to.
I have certainly earned it, and will be proud to display it and pass it on.
Thanks again,
The Party Pooper.”
Or the fourth way.
d) If someone tags me and wants me to bleat about myself, I’ll ignore the specific meme and say:
I will gladly pass it on to five others on behalf of the person who tagged me. 
THE AWARDS
Those are another kettle of fish.
Nice Blogger, Thoughtful Blogger, Kind Blogger, Funny Blogger.
These don’t send me into panic mode, as I don’t have to write essays about myself. And they do impart a warm fuzzy feeling.
It’s like getting a computer with an “Intel Inside” label. I’m not sure what it means, but it is supposed to be something good.
The problem is that you gotta mention them on your blog and pass them on. Now, if you give me a box of six chocolate truffles and say you gotta take just one and pass the rest on to five others, that’s a gift with strings attached. That’s not the way a gift is supposed to be.
Especially if you’re a greedy, stingy brat like myself.
If I get the SmartyPants Award, and I’ve gotta to name five others, it means, eventually, like a chain letter, everyone is a smarty pant. So what’s the point?
Not that I mind the whole lovefest and linkfest, but I want to be the Smartest SmartyPants. Passing it around like Halloween candy just makes me a statistic.
It’s like the Chimanlals bag. When I lived in Bombay, at parties, the in thing to bring was an expensive bottle of imported wine. The only place in town that sold gift bags sized for wine bottles was Chimanlals. My friends and I had a little game.
We had a trademark sign with which we would mark a Chimanlals wine bag in an inconspiciuous corner, and watch if the bag (with the same bottle or another one) eventually wound its way back to us. Months later, my friend got one marked by me from a third person.
Similarly, I got a blogging award, passed it around and followed the trail, as it was re-awarded to me.
There are some awards, though, that haven’t been passed around like flyers on a subway. For months, now, I’ve seen them here, and have been waiting for someone to pass them on to me.
Finally, I just decided to go ahead and post a plea here.
Please send one to me. I will post it, and say it’s from you. If I find suitable candidates, I may even pass it on.
- Bee
Imitation, Flattery, or Just Plain Cheating by Cynthia at Forgive Me My Nonsense.
Filed Under: awards, blogging, meme, MUSINGS, tags
29 Comments
Love love love this post, I’d seen it on DH earlier, some time ago when I wanted to revisit it, DH had been locked down. Thanks for resurfacing it here, I share most of your sentiment(even though I am not a happening blogger, I shirk from tags as well). Its now been delicious’ed forever. Happy 4th bee!
I had read this too before!
I love to read MeMes but I have stopped dong those now, gets boring after sometime!
Have a great weekend, 3 days of fun this time!:))
ROFLMAO !
Excellent post, first time i am reading. I ve been tagged many times,in my 10 things i hate tag, i even mentioned openely i hate tags which is not related to food….. And till now never passed or tagged anyone….Most important thing, “privacy” and second “time consuming”
Happy weekend Bee!
Bee,I understand what u mean and agree to send an email to know more if they are interested.
Very beautifully written post.
What a fun post. It completely clarified what I was thinking in my mind. I surely belong to the party pooper category! At least now I have a term for it.
this is just too much…:)..I remember every single line from last year..and you made me read thr it again!!!..
Did Sia save the comments to that post? Those made hilarious reading, too! You know why, of course…
I remember this one from last year…I need that party pooper award…NOW!!!
Remember what I told you? I’ll never, ever tag you and you don’t ever give me any of those awards!
bee… i love ur rants
and manisha, i guess i might be having those comments too… let me chk
Good one.
Hi Jai and Bee, Loved your post. Thanks for reposting it… I had read it before, too. I hope that Jai gets a better share of the limelight now?
I was so initially afraid of memes and awards that when I got my first one I waited for a long long time before posting the response. In the end I chose to do so, because of the sentiment behind the award or meme, more than the actual act of passing it on and the requirements attached to receiving it. So actually now I don’t mind receiving them and it gives me a wonderful opportunity to highlight the person who awarded it to me. That gives me a lot of pleasure. (having said that, I think I still have one award left to acknowledge. Note to self: Must do so soon. Perhaps not pass it on, though.
PS. I have rethought my comment about passing it on. I have been introduced to many great blogs in the posts of awardees. So now I am not sure what I will do in future. I do love to mention the great work of others.
Hahahaa… I love doing tags but I can see your point too
The point I can NOT see is the one where all those “awards” get passed around until every single award is on every person’s blog. 
Could I borrow your party pooper award, please? I wont be passing it on to anybody!
i’ll give you the award – soon – officially.
I remember it too
Have great weekend
You are too paranoid but I totally understand what you mean. Secondly, you obviously have a lot of time on your hands for this long post, which I love!
This is the first time I reading this. Loved it totally. You have courageously written what many others are thinking. Even I belong to the “guilty” category.
Enjoyed revisiting this post.
Agree with a lot of your sentiments. But memes are really optional. I guess, here, awards are optional too.:)
As for awards, it does seem like everyone has got every award so what’s an award really worth? Maybe it is that there really are so many wonderful bloggers out there.
Personally, I feel it is impolite not to acknowledge that someone has seen my blog and feels it desrves an award. But I also believe the award gives me the freedom to decide what I want to do with it.:)
Me again. Chimanlals is still around and they sell in Goa. They’ve got some lovely stuff apart from those bags.
And now I know where to go to send out awards!
Seeing this post for the first time, and could not help nodding my way thru it.
You hit the nail on the head, when u say they get passed around like flyers, with the added pain of passing on those flyers to others. Although, i also feel that in small doses, if passed on with a lot of thought and logic, they have their uses such as highlighting a lovely but unknown blog, or expressing admiration for a great blog.
However, on the whole I also feel that the whole awards business has become gimmicky, and kudos to you for putting it across so articulately.
Hey i always love to read ur rants.nice write ups. i used to like MEMEs but after a while becomes monotonus thouh..
Woohoo…I’m nodding like a madcow reading this & awarding myself ‘party pooper’, ‘dead horse’,'dead cockroach’ etc as I go along. Am just another statistic too at the end of the day, & reading a tag in a comment makes me feel panicky in the pit of my stomach!! This is a hilarious & brilliantly written post…& hopefully next year I can also say it was great revisiting it! I loved the Chimanlals bit too…how true that is!!
What a fun read and very well expressed
I agree every word of it. But these kind of naggings are needed in the early days of blogging, when you earn for visitors, comments and some good friends through your blog. But when you have them enough, things start to bore you! Am I right?
You’re spot on about memes. I have a number that have piled up and can’t think how to deal with them–respond (in a way that does not invite identity theft) and assuage my guilty feeling? or just ignore them and be done with it? I suspect that laziness will make my decision for me soon enough. But if I should ever pass on a meme to you guys, I will make sure to address it to Jai!
I love the Chimanlal’s story.
When I got my first one, and it said send it on to five people, I felt very happy but at the pit of my stomach there was an emptiness, because there are too many floating around, and when anything is available in plenty to one and all, it loses charm! You are right, but I still carry on! In fact I remember passing on one to you too….ha ha!
Haha – Love the awards here
)) I don’t love these either…but what comes around should go around 
)))))
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