Every person’s hair is different and as a parent you need to spend some time to work out what is the best way to manage your child’s hair.

For some parents of mixed-race children, doing their child’s hair can be a nightmare for both parent and child. Not all mixed-race children have hair that is difficult for their parents to manage but if you do, then here are some helpful tips to make it easier for you and your child.

Doing somebody else’s hair is not something most of us think about, we spend a great part of our lives getting to know our own hair and no matter how easy it may look to others many people find that it takes them a while to find a style and way of managing their hair that they feel comfortable with. When you have a child you have to go through the whole process again and for most parents their children’s hair will not be like their own.

 

 

It is essential to your children’s sense of identity and self-esteem that they are given the opportunity to look like they are well-cared for and groomed; this is particularly true for mixed-race families, already subjected to unusual social scrutiny by others. How your children look can shape the conclusions outsiders draw. Children notice others’ assessments and often interpret them as evidence of their own inadequacy. Young children are very concrete. They need to feel beautiful and handsome to contribute to a sense of pride in who they are. If their hair is a source of frustration and unhappiness, not just for them but for you, they may begin to develop low self-esteem.

How often should you wash your child’s hair?
Every person’s hair is different and as a parent you need to spend some time to work out what is the best way to manage your child’s hair. If your child’s hair is straight and of European texture then it is a matter of ensuring that the hair is kept regularly washed and conditioned. A regular trim will ensure a good growth rate. If your child’s hair is not of a regular European texture then it will need to be treated differently and you will need to find more specialised hair products.

The first thing to work out is if the hair is naturally dry or greasy, most afro type hair is naturally dry and if this is the case with your child’s hair you have to be very careful about keeping enough moisture and oil in their hair. Water is a drying agent, too frequent washing may dry out the hair, preventing the natural oils to moisturize. Washing once or twice a week should be enough but it is not uncommon to wash it once a fortnight.

How often should you comb or brush and style your child’s hair?
At least daily, unless your child’s hair is kept plaited and then it can be left longer. Children may be tender-headed and may dislike this process, but if you don’t do it consistently, their hair will begin to matt, making combing impossible.

Very often, parents feel bad because their children cry while having their hair combed, but many children cry at first when having their hair done, even when they have same-race parents. Nonetheless, they are still entitled to look and feel good about themselves. And with daily (or more frequent) brushing, the hair will have fewer mats and thus hurt less with time. Natural-bristle brushes are often softer and easier to use than synthetic brushes. If your child’s hair is very dry then you may need to use a moisturiser to make brushing easier. If your child has a lot of hair then try doing small sections at a time, this will make it easier to manage. If your child has the type of hair that gets tangled easily, then putting it in plaits before bed will make it easier to manage in the morning..

Should you use the same products on your child’s hair as your own?
Probably not. There are special products designed specifically for your child’s type of hair. Do not assume that because your child has afro type hair that all black hair products will be good for your child’s hair. Most mixed-race children that have afro texture hair, have hair that is in between European and black hair. Some black hair products will be too heavy or greasy for your child’s hair and some European products will be too drying. You will have to experiment to a certain degree.

There are now some hairdressers that specialise in mixed-race afro hair but these are rare. If you know mixed-race adults ask them how they care for their hair, just like you they would have had to experiment to find what works best for their hair and most would be only to happy to offer advice.

What is a relaxer? Should you press or straighten your child’s hair?
Relaxers are chemicals, which straighten hair. These should not be tried without professional consultation, and they are rarely suggested for children under 6 years old. To press hair means to heat it, making it straighten. Again, very young children do not usually have the patience for this kind of procedure, which should be taught by a professional the first time. Using chemicals is not recommended, it destroys the hair and more importantly it sends a message to your child that their hair is not beautiful as it is. Most individuals relax and straighten their hair because they feel that they cannot manage it as it is. As a parent it is important that you help your child learn to manage their hair without having to resort to the use of chemicals and heat treatments.

Should I take my child to a professional salon or do it at home?
Finding a good hairdresser is hard for anyone and mixed-race individuals with afro type hair find it even more difficult. For boys a visit to a barber shop can be a good experience. If their hair is kept short then most barber shops even the one in the high street will be able to manage it. If their hair is left long however then you will experience problems finding a hairdresser that knows how to manage your child’s hair. If there is a black hairdresser in your area then it is worth a visit to see if they have a stylist who is experienced with mixed-race afro hair. They will certainly have experience of braiding and caring for dreadlocks. The best policy is to learn how to manage your child’s hair yourself, ask other parents and mixed-race individuals for advice. Corn rowing also known as French plaiting is now a popular style for European hair. Most hairdressers know how to do it. Ask if you can watch someone having their hair done and practice on your friends or your own hair until you feel confident doing your child’s hair. Plaiting is a good way to keep your child’s hair neat and easy to manage. If you can’t manage to plait your child’s hair yourself find someone who can and ask them if they would do it for you. You may have to pay them a small fee but it will be worth it for you and your child.

Original post:  Hair Need Not Be A Nightmare:mixed-race parenting:Intermix.org.uk.

Things may have seemed a bit quiet for a while with Nature’s Parlour but I can assure you that we’ve been very busy behind the scenes…with a new baby!

Elijah was born at home in a water birthing pool on 15th March weighing 7lb 3oz.  He’s a peaceful and happy baby and we feel very blessed to have him!

Those of you who know about my pregnancy and the birth (thank you for the best wishes!) have asked me what kind of skin/hair care regimine I have for him, well here it is:

We use coconut oil for his skin and hair after he has been top & tailed or bathed.  We use a bit of aloe vera gel in his hair before the coconut oil, for ph balance (stops his hair from getting dry and brittle.)

If we’re going to give him an extra long baby massage session and want to use something other than coconut oil, we use sesame oil after his night time bath.  We might add a couple drops of lavender essential oil to the sesame oil to promote relaxation and prepare him for bed.

If we’re receiving visitors or if we’re visiting people, we use Curly Qs Moist Curls Moisturiser in his hair followed by Curly Qs Gel-les’c and then brush his hair smooth.  We wash his hair with Curly Qs Cleansing Cream.

In honour of our new addition, we’ll shortly be selling baby bum-bum balm as we don’t like to use petrochemicals on Elijah’s skin and use a natural “no-petroleum jelly”.  We’d like to share it with you all, so watch this space!

Have you ever wanted to know how best to choose your Blended Beauty products?

Take a look at this little video and you’ll be well on your way to chosing the perfect Blended Beauty products for your hair type!

Looking after your mixed-race child’s hair can be quit intimidating, particularly if their hair type is very different to your own and you’ve never dealt with that texture before. The type varies from very frizzy/afro to straight and every variant in between.

There’s always the issue of what products to use and some people consider relaxing the child’s hair using harsh chemicals to remove the kinks/curls. If you follow these five tips, you’ll find that managing your child’s hair need not be so difficult and can actually be a time of bonding for you both.

1. Use products specifically for your mixed-race child’s hair

Afro products tend to be too oily and European products tend to be far too drying. Use products specifically for mixed race hair. Curls has a children’s line called Curly Qs and Blended Beauty has a children’s line called Blended Cutie – they are a fantastic organic range of products specifically for your mixed range child’s hair.

2. The curlier/frizzier the hair, the less often you should wash it.

Afro hair tends to be very dry and shouldn’t be washed as frequently as straight hair. The wash hair once or twice a fortnight depending on how curly the hair is.

3. Comb the hair whilst conditioner is in it.

Always condition your child’s hair after shampooing as it needs to be more moist than straighter hair types. Conditioner makes the hair very slick, so this is a good time to use a wide toothed comb to comb knots out of your child’s hair. Gently rinse all of the conditioner out of the hair, taking great care not to create more knots

4. Use a moisturising cream/spray after towel drying

Ensure that your child’s hair is maintained in a (very slightly) damp state using a moisturising cream/spray. The hair must not be allowed to get to a dry/brittle state as this encourages breakage

5. Practice looking after your little one’s hair

Practice, practice, practice looking after your little one’s hair. After watching and learning how to look after your own hair, you had to practice until you got it just the way you wanted it. The same is true for looking after your mixed-race child’s hair. You may not get to the stage you’d like to be at with it straight away, but don’t give up! Be proud of your child’s curls and instil a sense of pride in your child too. If you want to learn advanced hair techniques like cornrowing/canerowing then find the resources and practice either on your own child or on a or hairdressers manikin or Girl’s World doll – that’s how most people who use these techniques learn at first.

If you have any more tips (or would like some more!), we’d love to hear from you. Please post your comments below.

Yours naturally

Xina