Surely you must be joking. I never joke, and don’t call me Shirley.

In my Neopets guild, my rank is Jester — an honorary title mostly, I liked it better than the regular Council ones! And so this month I won the “Member of the Month” award. Part of my prize is to organize a quest for all of the other members.

Seeing as how I’m the guild jester, I thought it fitting that I request they send me their best jokes. Here are two really cute ones I got this week:

Two women went out for ladies night out. They got a little tipsy and decided to walk home for the bar. On the way home they each had to use the bathroom. They were walking by a cemetery and decided to hide behind a grave marker and go. Neither having paper it was decided they would use their underwear and just throw them away. Well the first lady goes and throws hers away. When the other lady goes she has on some expensive underwear and does not care to lose them so she grabs a big ribbon of some flowers on a adjacent grave.

The next day the one husband calls the other and says “I dont think we should have girls night out anymore, my wife came home with no underwear.†Well the other husband says, “Is that all? My wife came home with a note attached to her butt that read ‘FROM ALL OF US AT THE FIRE STATION, THANKS FOR THE MEMORIES!’â€

Q: What has 75 balls and screws old ladies?
A: Bingo